UGGS are OK? “Chic as Heels” says Andre Leon Talley

We know Andre Leon Talley from his iconic role at Vogue as editor-at-large, appearing in the September Issue, and a brief judging/mentoring stint on America’s Next Top Model. He’s coined iconic fashion terms like “dreckitude” (train-wreck), but Anna Wintour’s lackey has a new statement phrase, and this one’s a shocker! Uggs are chic.

ALT was spotted wearing a pair of grey shearling UGG boots at Fashion week. And he wasn’t overcoming a sprained ankle or late night out in heels either. Talley is a devotee of the fuggly footwear and owns a shocking 15 pairs of the Australian furry boots!

Apprently Andre Leon Talley says that the frumpy comfy footwear keeps him grounded. “Uggs for me are a moment of utilitarian comfort that keeps you anchored in the reality of today’s world, which is very important.”

Please. He could have easily worn a pair of Frye motorcycle boots or Tods loafers that are equally as comfortable. Not only that, I have a big problem with wearing anything shearling when it’s over 10 degrees celsius. And New York Fashion week has been hot this year! It seems that as soon as kids are back to school and the first orange leaf falls on the sidewalk, the bread-loaf wearing masses come out.

Case in point: my sister’s high school. Now I went to that high school, and I managed to survive four years without ever having a piece of sheep fur touching my feet. And yet, it seems to be a social status to wear UGGs. The main reason is fitting in. I don’t know who would want to join a herd of mindless girls wearing brown bread loafs on their feet. I recently started calling them UGG hooves. Like a herd of club-footed sheep. I think the main reason why UGGs are elite is because their price tag is steep (over $250 in Canada, but I was shocked to see the 300 euro pricetags across the pond…) They are made of high-quality sheepskin but you can buy a shearling rug at IKEA for $40, therefore, the price still isn’t justified.

Talley added, “Uggs are comfort shoes and it’s important to have a shoe that gives you a sense of comfort. I have about 15 pair of Uggs — the same shoe, the same color. And I also have the bedroom slippers. It’s my shoe of choice at this moment of 2012 — it has been my shoe of choice. I love that you noticed I’m wearing Uggs. And this is a Tom Ford bag.”

UGGs and Tom Ford in the same sentence? Shoe of choice? First of all, they’re not shoes. I don’t even know why I’m taking style advice from someone who wears a robe and pyjamas on a daily basis. I can almost feel Anna Wintour’s scathing glaze in the picture above. The fur he’s wearing? Fab. The fur on his feet? Total “dreckitude”.

But I have a disclaimer to make in this post… and this might come to a shock to most of you.

Hello. My name is Natalie and I own a pair of Uggs.

I can’t continue with this rant without owning up to the sand-coloured pair of shearling calf-high boots that sit in my furnace room alongside my cowboy boots and treasured pairs from Italy. I will continue with my own UGG rules, that anyone can use as a guide before deciding to slip on a pair.

  1. Never roll the tops down. It looks like you have a bread-loaf cupcake at your feet.
  2. Never wear the footwear-that-shall-not-be-named when it is rainy, snowy, slushy or salty outside. Especially if you live in an urban setting, salt stains were never a good look.
  3. One must also take note that these are boots. They should be worn in appropriate climates and temperatures, no matter how cool Australian surfers and Kate Hudson in LA look like.
  4. Foam soles are for slippers, not for your feet. Buy a pair with a rubber sole.
  5. Thou shalt not wear UGGs with a dress. Or skirt. Or tights. Or barelegs. Or for the love of Vogue and all that’s holy in fashion, NO SWEATPANTS. Which leaves: jeans.

Now that you’ve learned these five essential rules to wearing UGGs, you can wear them comfortably on a Saturday morning coffee date with a friend (not boyfriend, it’s a fact; men hate UGGs), while walking your dog or how I wear them–to warm up for a ballet class. Yes dear friends, that is the reason why I own a pair of UGGs. I wear them before I dance because they make my feet nice and toasty so that I can dance easier. Also, I can actually warm my feet up in the subway on my way to class instead of wearing down slippers that might make me look like a bag lady with a bun – which would be an even bigger fashion offence.

High-schoolers, Andre Leon Talley and yuppie moms everywhere, listen up! There is no excuse for your UGGs. Yes, they are no longer a fad and can be considered a “footwear mainstay” perhaps even “iconic” but it’s for all the wrong reasons. Fashion is supposed to be synonymous with pain, beauty and design. And if you’re not looking to be fashionable but rather comfortable, please, do yourself and your image a favour. Wear sneakers.